Homo 2012

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By Angelo Esperanzate, contributor

Why is homosexuality a big issue?

That’s always been the biggest question I’ve wanted to ask people who think that what one feels in his or her heart greatly affects the world in general. Being gay, as far as I know, is the capacity of one person to share affection in pursuit of a lifetime partnership with another who is of the same sex. I don’t see anything that should merit a clamor from anyone at all. I’d actually go as far as consider that the reason there are people fighting for LGBT rights is because there are those who think it best to meddle and prevent the sharing of love to begin with – Newton’s third law of motion, about equal and opposite reactions.

Genders: What societal roles do they define?

Gender roles, like sexuality, have always been fluid. There is proof in history that it these roles can be different for everyone, in every culture. There should be no cause for disparity or hate for those who choose to go against what is thought to be “normal,” much like today. Gender roles have been as flexible in our country’s past as it is with other countries’ current practices. The ‘bayog’ or the transgender ‘babaylan’ of our indigenous folk from pre-colonial times, and the Fa’afafine of the Samoans today, are such examples.

But in the Philippines, society tends to stereotype gays and transgender individuals among the ‘parlorista,’ and our lesbian sisters as ‘security guards.’ We have a very rigid need to define the confines of how everyone should be and act. This is a very limiting habit of our culture that leads to discrimination and hate, if left unchecked.

One perspective says that boys should grow up to be men who provide for their wives, who in turn should stay at home and care for the home and family. It’s a pretty picture, isn’t it? We shouldn’t paint it any other way, say some. However, that’s not always the way life turns out.

What should we do when people can’t help but feel strongly instead for someone of the same gender? Shun them? I believe that gender roles shouldn’t be dictated by a book. They should be dictated by every individual, as he or she sees fit.

Photo provided by Angelo Esperanzate.

Sexuality: It’s the way I see myself; why should you care?

Is it such an affront for a person to love? Isn’t it what we all want, for love to conquer all odds? Nowadays there’s a big, ugly head spreading bigotry and double standards even when it comes to happy endings. Women still find it hard for them to pursue that fairytale life of theirs in this very machismo-oriented world; what more for those of the rainbow community?

We all live lives of our own, achieve for ourselves what we deem best, and all through our own doing. Shouldn’t it also be the same way about affection, and whomever we want to spend the rest of our lives with?

Maybe it’s a matter of sex? According to the bible, there’s only man and woman. Not everyone is Christian, for goodness’ sake. Stop trying to run the world as if everyone is among your constituents, please.

What I really think

Often, friends come out to me because they say that they find me a very confident gay man. I tell them I get my strength from my goals. I am a gay man, yes, but that is just part of me, and it does not define my entirety. Let’s be logical: me loving another man doesn’t really have a direct influence on how I do my work. I tell them, homosexuality shouldn’t really be your focus.

We should always look towards bettering ourselves, homosexuals or not, to be the best version of whom we want to be. The choice of whom we want to love isn’t really as important compared to what we can do to better the world.

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